Strategies for Alcohol Sobriety During Social Gatherings

As a therapist supporting many folks in their sobriety and recovery, I’ve witnessed the strength it takes to navigate these spaces. Your awareness in planning ahead already shows tremendous self-awareness and care. Let me share some practical strategies for maintaining your sobriety during social events while honoring your commitment to your wellbeing.

Here are some powerful approaches that center your needs:

Before the Event:

  • Create a clear exit plan — know exactly how you’ll leave and have your own transportation ready
  • Ask a trusted friend to be your support person for check-ins (text or in-person)
  • Practice saying “no thank you” or “I’m not drinking tonight” with confidence
  • Pack your favorite non-alcoholic drinks to ensure you have options you enjoy

During Celebrations:

  • Keep a non-alcoholic drink in hand to reduce offers from others
  • Position yourself away from the bar area
  • Focus on meaningful conversations and joyful activities that don’t center around drinking
    • Dance, sing, karaoke
    • Play games
    • Catch up with safe people
    • Be of service to others (pass out cake, or a group greeting card)
  • Take breaks when needed — step outside for fresh air or find a quiet space to ground yourself
  • Remember you can leave at any time — your wellbeing comes first

Building Your Foundation:

  • Connect with your support system before and after events
  • Plan activities for the next morning that you’ll look forward to
  • Bring activities to share — card games, music, or food can create alcohol-free fun
  • Consider hosting your own gatherings where you control the environment

Having a hard time saying “No” to elders, relatives or members of a group who often drink as a form of celebration, socializing and connecting? We all have those people in our lives who push drinks on us.

Let me share some culturally-affirming ways to decline drinks while maintaining respect and connection. These responses center your boundaries while honoring relationships and cultural dynamics.

For family gatherings and cultural celebrations:

  • “Gracias tía/tío, I’m taking care of my health right now — your support means everything to me”
  • “[Insert role or term of endearment for an Elder] I deeply appreciate the offer. I would love to share a cup of tea/coffee with you instead”
  • “Thank you for including me — I’m carrying on the strength of our ancestors by choosing a clear mind tonight”
  • “I’m focused on being present for our family/community today — may I get you some water instead?”
  • “I’m so grateful to be here celebrating with you. I’ll take some juice or agua fresca if you have it”

For professional and social settings:

  • “I’m embracing new traditions in my life — thank you for understanding”
  • “I’d love to connect and celebrate with you over something non-alcoholic”
  • “I’m honoring my journey of wellness tonight — would you like to join me in a mocktail?”
  • “Thank you for thinking of me. I’m choosing clarity tonight to fully enjoy our time together”
  • “I appreciate you including me in the toast — I’ll raise my glass of sparkling water to celebrate with you”

The key is speaking from a place of self-respect while acknowledging the spirit of connection behind the offer. Your choice to stay sober is an act of self-love that ripples out to benefit your entire community.

Remember, those who truly care about your wellbeing will respect your boundaries. You don’t owe anyone an explanation beyond what feels authentic to share.

Most importantly though, your recovery journey is deeply personal. These strategies aren’t one-size-fits-all — you know yourself best. Take what resonates and leave what doesn’t.

If you’re feeling overwhelmed about an upcoming event, consider if attending aligns with your current needs. It’s perfectly valid to decline invitations when that feels right for you.

Lastly, every time you honor your commitment to sobriety, you’re strengthening your relationship with yourself. That’s something to celebrate.

Be well. You got this.

Sofia

About the authoR

Sofia Mendoza, LCSW

I’m passionate about helping individuals through their challenges, childhood memories, trauma, parenting and life transitions. I use a combination of strength-based, behavioral, and cognitive interventions to help clients become present, focused and skillful — all in an effort to train them to become their own therapists while developing a life worth living.